There was one day, I couldn't fucking remember that day. But roughly, I was going out to Kuala Lumpur. Planned it early before and got off from the house not to much on time. I'm used to doing that. That is me. I walked to the bus stop and had a sit. It was a clear, wonderful and gorgeous day. Sun was madly shining. My cornea shrinked. It was that bright. I was alone at first. No one was waiting there. Maybe the hot day sum up everything. Who would want to be stucked in that. In my mind, I was getting this imaginary scene, that what if I waited here for an hour? What if the bus hasn't come yet after half an hour? Will I be toasted? Will I get stary eyed from pedestrians? Well, fuck it. There is no surprise, stary eyed is the only thing I'm used to. But to be toasted in the middle of the day? Well, what a start. My day is made. Toasted. The first 10 minutes, I was enjoying the breeze. The tantalizing rising sun relaxed my skin a bit. I was sweating. I can't lie. Of course. Well, no one came to join me. No one seemed to come up and atleast be my partner of the excrutiating, deadly weather and loneliness themselves.
I sighed many times. Kept blaabbermouthing "Where is this fucking bus" many times. I mean patience is one thing. But hot weather is another business unintended. I love swearing. Publicly, I called out many ignoramt bitches and assholes. Well, this feeling of it, it's just unbearable. So I kept swearing in the next 15 minutes. I looked around. Was enjoying the calm sound of the wafted breeze. Literally, it's like Beyonce singing 'Rocket' (For those who haven't listened to that song, try to check it out). And finally! Finally! There was a 'person'. A normal 'person' whom I ain't never had of getting near a judgement over this 'person'. An old, sweet looking Indian auntie came out of the car. Someone dropped her by the bus stop. Wearing a traditional Indian outfit. Sari and stuffs. She sat near me. Couple yards away but on the same bench. I didn't smile. Quite shy actually. Nahh, I was. Couldn't have been any much better act but to stay still. Checked my stuffs a bit. Checked my phone, if there was any text. Checked my bags. Everything was spot on. Nothing was left home.
As I was swearing the F word, finally from distance, I saw a moving big vehicle. That was the bus! Alhamdulillah. Good god! I definitely didn't talk to the auntie. Nahh, I was minding my own business and naturally staying still. Nothing crossed my mind of getting near to say 'Hi. She sat there, looking around. As I reached into my bag to take my purse to take RM1 for the ticket, the auntie opted out of the blue. She asked me first "Tunggu bas ke?" - "Yeahh" - "Tu sudah sampai bas" - "Yahh Yahh" - "Jaga itu beg adik, Melayu sangat jahat lahat". For seconds, I shut my mouth. Surprised. Very surprised. I smiled as an answer to that 'statement' she just made'. I saw the bus was coming. As I was standing up, she continued and "Saya penah, saya punya kawan, beg dia kena tarik sama Melayu. Melayu jahat lah dik. Jaga beg elok elok". What made me even more mad, is that, she just smiled making that statement. No no no. I was not focusing on her smile, I literally stumped by the statements. I stood up and just smiled at her and the bus stopped infront of me and I boarded.
Just to clarify and devour her thoughts, I was clearly pissed off. I don't know if she was confused or is it my face looking so Chinese? I bet it is the reason. I look like a Chinese and therefore, she makes a statement condemning Melayu just because I look like Chinese. I mean, c'mon, it got worser when she replied the word "Melayu jahat' and fucking smile with it? No fingers pointing out. No hand signals to atleast less focus on Malays. Giving the look to that auntie, it breaks my heart. For the past years, I have never ever met a 'person', whom generally speaking, as Malaysians, living amongst each other everyday, facing different attitudes of people, weather it would be your culture or other than that, to have such ball opting out alone by herself and making that statement. I stray off from my static move that time. Look, I understand, she must have been confused or just fucking blind by my look. Yes I do look like a Chinese. I'm not praising myself alone, but people have come up to me and said the same exact thing. Even Chinese have done it. They have spoken chinese with me. Unintendedly. I have no problem with that. It's something I see as to what might come up later in my life. Nothing personal. But hearing an Indian, getting confused, or less than that, does it purposely and gives such shade to Melayu is such absurd. This is what I see for the next 5 or 8 years to come. It is an issue to whomever have dealt with, that is just gonna emerge many times. She smiled? She fucking smiled with a statement, to my personal life, is very hurtful. I mean, she could've been atleast, if she thought I was Chinese, maybe ask some questions about me. Or just come near and sit and fucking talk. How on earth did she just come up on me and fucking said something so personal. This happens to so many people that are just, cold-heartedly having a perception and preconceive idea over various races and religions and fucking make a mistake and misunderstood them completely. No. I would have been a big fat ass talker, to sit for atleast 20 minutes and have a talk, if she asked about me or any problems about any races. I know stuffs. It didn't matter at that time cause she violated mine. I should have just smacked her in the pot holes. Anyway, to whoever out there, that publicly have seen or heard or by far, dealt with this type of misunderstoods, I really hope that as it happened, nobody gets hurt. Any races, any religions exist today, are what somehow a revolution of what people before had passed on to us. We either have to preserve, or change. Good day. God bless us all. Assalamualaikum. Salam Sejahtera.
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